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45189 No.1017   [Delete]   [Edit

ITT we tell about our really fucking WEIRD dreams. I'll go first.

There was some kind of tournament for the fate of the world going on, kind of like in Warriors of Tao, only we didn't get anything nearly so cool as superpowers integrated into our body. Just combat partners. I was selected as one of the fighters for my world. I drove to a grocery store, as I had been instructed, and was immediately warped to 15th century england, where they still had grocery stores, porcelain toilets, and the Internet (by way of scrying the toilet). They had never cleaned the toilets though, and they looked disgusting. I remembered being revolted every time I had to touch the surface of the water to scry. Anyhow, I was cast as a squire, my partner was cast as a knight - and such an idiot. He didn't wear a helmet, he wore a cape and cowl. And he seemed obsessed with picking up maidens and carrying them around. And he was equipped with plastic salad tongs for a weapon. All seemed lost.

We then met up with our opponent, a "Dark Knight", fortunately as thoroughly stupid as my own partner, and a pathetic little fat kid that I'm convinced was just Porky from EarthBound wearing blackface. "Great", I thought, "They get a legendary schemer, we get an idiot and a geek." We then went on to find out that their job was not to kill us, but to simply prevent us from carrying out our task - this included inserting a glowing red box into a socket at the top of a mountain, getting something else I don't remember accomplished, and then removing the box from the socket before it served the purpose it was meant for.


Last edited 11/01/22(Sat)22:35.

>> No.1018   [Delete]   [Edit]

The purpose the cube was meant for, I found out by looking it up on the Internet through a toilet - the summoning ritual for something named Lugia, no relation to the pokemon. Lugia itself, or a small fragment of it, was visible on the mountainside. It was a great, dead, beehive-lke rectangle. Some parts were bony, and some fleshy, though the fleshy parts had dried and shrivelled at this point. After I had found the box (red, mysteriously glowing - made of cardboard?) I noticed that it had twelve latin words written on it. I don't remember what any of them were, but upon looking them up, I found that they were names of beings known as "The Hounds". Each mighty enough to be a god in its own right, they feared light, unless it was dim, and had their name written on it, in which case it attracted them.


I told my partner what I knew. He said it was time to stop playing around, and took off his cape and cowl.

The stupidity had been a front.

I recognized him instantly.

All was not lost, for my fighting partner was Wodin the All-Father!


>> No.1019   [Delete]   [Edit]

So Wodin and his ravens went and started making a fuss at the grocery store, making clear he had been one of us, and was looking for the cube. This drew Porky and Dark Retard's attention, while I set out climbing the narrow stone staircase to the socket. The Hounds' purpose was to return the box to its socket, so I knew I had their favor now, and didn't have to worry about them. They might be WHY I safely reached the top in spite of the pitch black night and the rickety railing. I slid the cube in, and the fragment of Lugia shone from within, life restored to its flesh. I knew I had very little time now. We did our other task - I don't remember what, either it was something to do with beer or Wodin just wanted to talk about how shitty this yellow crap they brew nowadays is, they had REAL beer in Asgard - and returned to the mountainside. The whole mountain was glowing like the sun was shining on it, in spite of the fact that it was four in the morning at this point. And some kind of black goat-things were crawling in and out of the holes in Lugia. I knew if I took the time to get up there and pull the lever to eject the cube, Lugia's resurrection would be complete, and Lugia was something along the lines of Azathoth, except knowingly malicious. It'd just be better for everyone if she kept napping.


>> No.1020   [Delete]   [Edit]

Wodin understood that I'd be too slow, in addition to knowing I was scared out of my mind, and sent his ravens up to grab the cube. When they brought it back down, the mountain had begun to dim already, and the grocery had lost power. I knew this was because the Hounds were coming. I told Wodin, "Great, now run like hell." We did. When the Hounds got too close - and you knew when one of them was close, because suddenly all you could see was its name, burning bright in red on every surface around you - Wodin dropped back, and put his gameface on, along with some shit he'd brought from Asgard, not least Megingiord and Mjolnir.

I swear, you have not known fear until you hear Wodin All-Father shrieking like a little girl at the sight of something that's chasing YOU.

I made it outside, just as the sun began to rise. Wodin followed shortly; his eye was empty and traumatized, but he was physically unhurt. The hounds would be gone while the sun was up, and Wodin offered to take the cube and place it under Baldur's care (poor fucker must've still been alive then). I knew Lugia hadn't been resurrected in the next five hundred years, so that wasn't too bad an idea. Wodin's submarine wouldn't start (because it was in the ground instead of in water), and so he called Sleipnir, which was a pug with impressive chest plumage rather than a horse, who then led him back to Asgard. I got in my truck and drove off, and before I knew it, I was in my hometown again, getting home and going to bed, where I immediately woke up.

Last edited 11/01/23(Sun)21:24.

>> No.1022   [Delete]   [Edit]


Your dreams are awesome.

Welp. Let's see, I'll dig though my dream diary (which I am currently in the process of transferring to digital).

I was in a supermarket which was supposedly Japanese, though everyone spoke English, of course. People were in the Supermarket (they were also supposed to be Japanese, but spoke English) and they were supposedly preparing for some kind of festival... in the supermarket. Yeah, that's right. Anyway, despite the fact that I was just a random person walking around, I was assigned to make food for some Japanese guy named Hayate Ozo. ( Don't ask. This was a few years ago.) It was a dish called "the mole" which involved some kind of sausage/wurst wrapped in seaweed and rice.

Hayate's mom was there, and I asked her to help me because let's face it, I can't fricking cook. She agreed, but when I left to go get an ingredient (this being a supermarket, they had everything I needed) she started sabotaging my food for no real reason. I tried to tell Hayate but he wouldn't listen to me, so eventually I told her to go away and hid what I had done in a different part of the store.

Turns out Hayate's mom is a witch- literally- because she chanted a spell to attack me with possessed shopping carts. Then she started summoning ghosts and shit and they started fucking up the entire supermarket. She used blue tama-bead things to do this, and the rest of us had to dance around waving red and yellow bead to dispel the ghosts.

Eventually I'd had enough. I went to confront her directly, but when I did I turned into some ridiculous Jigglypuff-Rayquaza hybrid with googly eyes and a shitton of mascara. Despite my incredibly retarded appearance, Hayate's mom demanded that I cut myself and spill my now-magical blood; then and only then would she dispel all of her summoned ghosts. I did so, and she held up her end of the bargain so that the festival could go on.

A few months later, I became a dragon for no reason.

>> No.1023   [Delete]   [Edit]

I had another dream, which was fucking I don't even.

Basically, me and my best friend at the time were slaves to... some priesty-looking people. We were hanging around in this Indian-looking jungle which somehow also had a beach and a bunch of Angkor Wat-like temples. We lived in a bunch of concrete barrack-looking places, but the floors were covered in sand like no one had bothered to put a floor in at all. The slave quarters were actually rather interesting: they were very open and comfortable and felt like home; since a lot of the people living there were children, there were a lot of toys and colorful blankets and pillows and things. I don't remember any of the slaves actually doing any labor or work, they just kinda hung around. Since we two were the oldest slaves (at 17) we had to take care of all the smaller ones.
So everything is fine and dandy until one day my buddy mysteriously goes missing. I have to go look for him, obviously, since I can't handle all those kids by myself, and I'm worried for him. So I run off to the big temple to look for the priests, because they should know where he is (since he's technically their property, y'know).... And I found them kneeling in front of this crystalline pool of water, praying fervently. My friend is kneeling in the water, nekkid, with a bunch of rose petals floating all around him and his eyes closed.

Then he turns into a black panther.

I run into the water to go drag him out of the water, but he's thrashing around and trying to bite me and failing miserably because he's drowning... and then I woke up.

>> No.1553   [Delete]   [Edit]

It's been a few months and I want to hear about YOUR fucked-up dreams, Anon!

>> No.1554   [Delete]   [Edit]

i never remember whole dreams, just little bits that stuck out as being really odd, such as a banana coloured snake and family of sharks living under my bed, fleeting thoughts like "I might go and change my facebook status to superby's" i don't know what a superby's is but apparently my subconscious does.

there was another one where a TV was trying to sell me videotapes of random peoples birth scenes, yes, it was the TV and not a voice coming from the TV. there was another one where i crawled through this concrete duct into a room with a whiteboard and some small yellow girders in it, i wrote some shit about politics and other stuff i can't understand or remember well, then i noticed these mercury-coloured aliens with balloon heads in lab coats staring at me with these huge multi-coloured eyes. strangely this didn't unsettle me at all, I just looked away. after that I think I just left to chase something with red hair.

i remember another one where it started off as me and a friend trying to sneak across this field trying to not set off the sprinklers, right at the very end my friends just fucks everything up and i end up running into this house being chased by my other friends who keep trying to fight me for some reason. i ran into the back of this house to avoid them, and jump up onto this ledge like a cat and sit there for a bit. next thing I know i'm lying in a pile of clothes in my underwear and a shirt, I pull my phone out of a pocket that shouldn't have existed, i look at the phone and see that it's 5am and think to myself "shit, i better get home or mum is going to flip" so I walk out the door and it's dark. then i wake up.

that's all i can remember now.

>> No.1558   [Delete]   [Edit]

In the first part of my dream I was apparently on a highway driving a car, apparently looking for my dad. And at some part, there was this dude throwing candy bars at me and laughing at me.

Eventually I came to a stop in front of some ruins in the middle of some desert in god knows where, and some organization was looking at some bones and sticks, which they apparently needed for world dominance.
And for whatever reason, I stole them from them.

Later in the dream I went into some kind of underground dome, where I was trained to become a giant qwilfish. They had me go through training exercises, until I had become just the right shape.

Lastly, I was in a Borderlands-themed landscape, walking around. Until eventually I came across a cliff, and I saw Butters (from South Park) hanging on the side of an inactive volcano.
He screamed for help, and for some reason I decided to look into this random skull lying on the ground next to the cliff side. I looked into the dark back of it, and numbers were going by like some kind of lottery machine. The final number it showed me was 11. Butters asked me what number it was, and I said 11.
When I said that, the volcano started acting up. Butters was "safely" launched to the cliffside. However, someone else that looked like Butters suddenly fell down from the cliff, and I presume he died.
Butters said something to me afterwards, but I forgot what.

>> No.1559   [Delete]   [Edit]

There was also another one I've remembered for some time now.

I was walking around in my local mall, just doing normal stuff for a while. Then suddenly a Woody doll hanging onto a hotdog balloon came flying down from the sky. When it landed, Woody grew larger, and the hotdog balloon exploded into a gigantic white mess of what looked like whipped cream and cheese. Here begins the "apocalypse" part of my dream.

Me and a few other survivors were taking shelter inside one of the other nearby malls. Of course, we knew that the mall door wouldn't last for long. So we decided to take one of those jumping playcastles (you know what I mean - those soft castles kids jump in at carnivals and so on) in front of the door to help us protect against the outside dangers. Eventually we were gonna have to get supplies, so they sent me, a purple-haired lady, and a short red-haired girl with a giant spear out to get some.

We went to one other nearby mall, and there were things that looked like huge white gorillas walking around. And apparently they could hear a leaf fall from 2 kilometers away, so we had to sneak like fist of the north star to not get detected. At this point in my dream, I was chased by one of the things and killed. However my dream didn't end. Instead, it started over from the beginning. So of course, I knew what to do.
However that clearly wasn't the case as I died 2 more times before something different happened.

This time, what looked like a zombie Bobby (from King of The Hill) was trying to break open the playcastles we put up. He told us to let him in, but he was clearly infected and dangerous. And after a few minutes of trying to get it open, suddenly a giant came out of nowhere and ate him.

I can't remember more than this though, sorry.

>> No.1560   [Delete]   [Edit]

And last but not least, I once had a dream that was pretty much BANANA GHOST (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDRgmnm00lQ) but with different characters and not-so-catchy music.

To give you ideas of what it was while you watch the video, it had different anime and manga characters, and some Nintendo characters thrown into the mix. The music sounded like an orchestrated version of the Oompa Loompa song.
And at one point a horribly morphed version of Stu came up to me and said "It's too late for me to be doing this, I have to clock clock clock clock". I don't know either.

Last edited 11/09/15(Thu)00:28.

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