Oh! I love it! It's not crappy at all! I love the picture too. it adds to the mood somehow...BRAVO!!!

Well, it DOES belong to /lit/ to be honest.
But, concerning the quality of the piece, it's decent enough to post on there. All it needs is more length, though, but the people at /lit/ might help you with it.

where did the last name Niigata come from? just wondering iv never heard the name before. its very good! please continue! ill definately read it! :D

You put a lot of short sentences after each other (example: "Her apartment seemed rather untouched except for her room. Her room was tidy, but there were traces of her all over. She had a simple bookshelf, stocked with books about lucid dreaming, and how it works."), which makes it sound a bit staccato. Flesh some of the sentences out with more descriptions to contrast the ones you want to keep short, and it will flow much more nicely.
Other than that I really like this! I want to read more!

>>4809
>>4817
>>4823
Thank you for the positive feedback. :D I picked the name Niigata out of a list of common Japanese names, so it wouldn't surprise me if you had heard it before.

>>5000
Yeah, I kinda realized that after reading it a second time. :\ I love hearing how I can better my writing though.

I have the first (second?) chapter mostly written out, all that's left to do is review and edit before posting, so stay tuned. :D

i'll be looking forward to it!
i hope it'll be epic and better ending

Today, I begin my journey into the deepesft crevices of my subconcious mind. I leave my outside world and its inhabitants, for a place solely of my own. I have mastered the skill of lucidqity in dreaming, and I have created the world of which I will spend my new reality. My door is now locked from the outside, so I will not be tempted to escape out of fear. This is my dream journal; it is where I will keep my memory for future documentation. Today, I create a new life of my own.

Dream 1

As I awaken to find myself on my balcony, I aquire a tingling sense of excitement. The door which I had previously locked was now open, and it opened to a small circular room with neumerous doors, each with defining characteristics. The door of purple, I decided on, opened to a bizzarely colourful (albeit darkly lit) world. I gazed upon the floor to see it had been littered by strange tiles that made squeaking noises when stepped on. Undefinable faces surrounded me as I futily tried to make sense of it all. I spotted something in the distance; a figure with two wheels, it seemed. I made a beeline for the object, walking as fast as my mind would allow me. My assumptions had been correct, it was the bike I had owned from early childhood. It even made a familiar ringing noise as I hopped on the seat.

As I made my trek back to the door from whence I came, I noticed an elevator like entrance. I figured it would take me to somewhere of interest, so I rang the elevator up, and entered the very bright door.

I exited in my usual quiet, careful way, to a lobby with two escalators. The upper one was being blocked by a pylon, and I decided that it would be in my best interest to simply take the down escalator, in hopes of the upper one becoming opened later. I stepped off the non-moving stairs to see a blank faced woman walking in circles with no discernible direction. She was holding something... a phoone, perhaps? I began to approach her, but that only began to reveal her true nature. Her stomach began to creep open, seeping with blood as she made a terrible groaning noise. I could only watch in horror as the blonde woman began to run spactically, spraying the terrifying liquid everywhere with every step she took. I became mortified, and the only thing my mind could think to do was wake up, so I pinched my cheek in an attempt to wake myself, and it worked.

Today I make a note in my journal to forget her, and continue on without objecting, no matter the trials.

Also, the story looks alot better on my blog:
http://pileopapers.blogspot.com/

But if you like it here, that's fine too

Last edited 10/11/16(Tue)15:09.

i think the door in reality wasn't locked, it'll be better
if she really doesn't want to go outside because a trauma of her life she had
and who's the girl with the phone and bleeding stomach? i never see such a girl

Please continue writing this please!