>>1158
>>1159
>>1356

>>1411

it's the internet.

did you expect it not to get vandalized sooner or later?

>>1413
No, I expected it to be honest, but I still don't think it's right.

>>1411

Thanks for supporting me a bit. I really didn't expect someone to vandalize what I worked on for hours to get close to looking even a bit decent.
I know its a wiki and that anyone should be able to edit it but I have restricted it from editing for awhile.

Also I'd probably be helped a WHOLE LOT if some people would tell me how the hell to make my characters in it less mary sueish and such. Geez. Nobody tries to help me in this world, and instead they just insult me. At least there are a few that actually care a bit.

Also your quote about it being My game and I can do whatever I want with it, I really really liked that. Thanks ^_^

Last edited 09/11/07(Sat)15:07.

>>1415

If you want to make more believable characters, try reading this:

http://www.anthologiesonline.com/Articles/Creating%20believable%20characters.htm

Read it thoroughly and then try what they tell you.

Also for everyone's information I am trying to make my own chipsets and character sprites, so on.
Until I actually get them done though I AM going to be using the Yume 2kki chipsets, but I will change them as soon as I get the chipset/sprites done for the characters/areas that are using the premade chipsets.

>>1416

Thanks. I'll read over it and try to see how to improve the characters so they aren't so mary-sueish!

Also, here is Mae's most recent sprite sheet. I just am putting them up here so that people can look at them and tell me how to improve them and such. :3

>>1419

This is the same person from >>1416 and I'm glad you're considering using the link to help with your character building.

But I have to ask, why does Mae have cat ears? Is there a reason behind it or is it just some random detail?

Sup Mae, another anon here with advice, opinions, and crit as well. Going to comment on writing and characterization mostly.

First off, premise is okay, I don't mind spinoffs. However, simply taking and recycling Kaokai is the first thing you are doing wrong; if another character was made as a homage to him instead, no one would probably have minded.

Title needs a redesign. Plain text on background won't do. Think about what you want your title to convey to your audience. Think about aesthetics. No matter how good the premise is, if presentation fails, the whole thing crumbles.

Characters: Why cat ears on Mae? Is there a reason why they are there? Never add details on something "just because" - it will reek of lazy character design, and lazy writing in general. Motivation seems plausible but it feels rather uninteresting at the moment.

Kaokai/Kanokai - Suffer from superficial aesthetic additions as well. To make something "creepy" (if that was your intention", you don't necessarily need the blood or weapons like chainsaws. Good horror is subtle, like a whisper. It does not "shout". Giving them chainsaws and maniacal grins is obnoxiously advertising these characters as "scary".

Also, why "Kanokai"? What is the justification for this name? Does it have meaning?

Knife princess: see above.

Other characters: Don't have much of an opinion on them yet.

Your wiki also suffers from too much 'tell'. "Show" your characters' traits. Make them do things that reveal their personality traits to the audience. Don't blatantly tell us that Character X is a psycho.

Well, I have to say, kudos for letting us help. :)

Anyway, yes. Title screen needs a makeover. Cat ears need explanation. Pretty much what everyone else is saying, too. But unless you're happy with the current title of this game, I'd recommend a new title. Try to be a little more creative, okay? (For example, pic is my game's title) :)

And make up your own scary face. Don't use Kaokai. For serious...

Last edited 09/11/08(Sun)01:10.

>>1420

Well, the entire reason I gave her cat ears was that before I logically dreamt most of the stuff for the game before hand....and Mae in all of my dreams seems to somehow have cat ears due to my love for cats.... But maybe if its too weird for her to have them I can remove them.

EDIT: actually, they are only real in the dream world, in the real world they are fake. A headband, I just don't know how to make the sprite change between worlds for now.

>>1421

Thanks for all the advice, After reading this over I most likely will take out Kaokai and replace it with something else, or maybe just make it only Kanokai.

As for Kanokai I logically designed her just to be Kaokai's other sister, But actually I might just scrap them both and try to think of something completely original. Do you think I can still use the library though?... Except make it a lot different?

As for the Knife Princess, I just made her up like two days ago or something x.x I am still trying to think of a good idea on what to do for her, really. I wasn't meaning for her even to be like Uboa with the 1/1000 chance of getting thing, but I thought that at least having ONE event in the game like that would be good. I can change that if people don't like it.

Also, Can you give me an example of how I would show their personality instead of telling then. ^_^; I don't exactly know how to in the right way.

>>1422

Your title screen is so much cooler. T_T

I don't know exactly how to make mine look so cool yet. Maybe you can suggest something to me? I like suggestions :3

Last edited 09/11/08(Sun)07:10.

Also, I have just uploaded a little preview of what I have so far in the game.
I made it so Mae has a cat-ear headband in real life, but real cat ears in the dream world.

Also, So I could get this done a bit faster, Would anyone happen to have a guide to making chipsets for RPGmaker 2003? Any attempts I do fail really badly. T_T

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jISpn1uW6To is the link to the stupid preview by the way. I consider it fail due to it not having the chipsets I want to make on it yet. And I am just making when you go to sleep transfer straight to the door room until I can make the actual real room chipsets. x__x;;

>>1423
I've been keeping my mouth shut about this whole deal for a long time hoping it'd play out on it's own, but by this point it doesn't seem like it's just going to blow over on it's own.

Now then, where to start.

Firstly and foremostly, do you honestly have a creative bone in your body? Not as an insult, but you seem to really heavily rely on others for ideas for this game in one form or another. Not that it's a bad thing to get ideas from other people, but what you seem to be wanting to go for is a full game made by you. This means you want to pour your own blood and tears into it, not someone else's. If you look at legendary examples of one-man games, such as Yume Nikki or Cave Story, everything in the game was designed in a specific style by the creator. Nothing was ripped from a different game in any form, save possibly a few segments meant as a tribute or homage to another game or person.

That said, the whole process of making a game like this takes a lot of various medium. art, sprites, music, gameplay design, and story. The reason that one-person development teams produce such great games is probably because they are in control of all of these, and can imagine the game as they create it, but it's not something everyone can do. Some people are great at art but horrendous at storyline, or great at programming and music but can't draw to save their lives. Either you have to pick up the slack and learn how to work in all the categories you don't excel at, or team up with a close friend or two to play off eachother's strengths. (Most amazing games back in the late 80s and early 90s were made by teams of no more than 2-8 people)

And above all, don't be afraid to just put the damn thing down if you get bored with it and come back to it 4 years from now when you start drawing it out of boredom again. I've abandoned, returned to, and rewritten all of my stories several times over the years, and my characters and art with every incarnation seem to develop further and further towards what I actually want them to be. None of them are anywhere near finished yet, but they're a hell of a lot further than where I was when I first started them years ago.

And please, if some random person says something on an imageboard or DA that isn't flattery to you, could you try and respond in a slightly kinder manner? not sugary-sweet-sickening but at least not with this harsh, demeaning tone I tend to hear all the time. I swear, every time I've commented to you in the last 4 or 5 months I've been responded to in this stuck-up and aggrivated manner, like you're irritated at me for wasting your time by saying something to you. I'm pretty sure you don't want to be an asshole to everyone, but you're doing a good job at putting off people who might help by putting on that show.

>>1425

I'm not trying to be mean or demanding or anything like that, I'm trying to stop with being that way to people who just want to help and such. Thats why I have been on here recently, I've been trying to get help from others that know more about RPG maker and other things than I do. And I have taken out all the things that were logically already in things like yume 2kki. I was only using the chipsets as a temporary thing until I learned how to make my own.

I have taken out Kaokai/Kanokai because they were not original, and I am trying my hardest to make my characters seem less mary sue-ish.

I would also like to make my OWN music for it aswell, but the problem with that is that I don't have a program or keyboard that can be hooked to my computer so I can make the MIDIs that I can put in the game, I already have most of the songs in my head that I want in the game, and as I said, the music and resorces other than the sprites I've already made are just temporary....

Plus, I am completely over being a pissed off bastard about other people's opinions. If I was still like that I'd be cursing you out, wouldn't I?... Thats proof that at least I am changing and such.

>>1425

>last statement

i agree completely, jesus christ
>>1426

>Plus, I am completely over being a pissed off bastard about other people's opinions. If I was still like that I'd be cursing you out, wouldn't I?... Thats proof that at least I am changing and such.

I really do not believe that, but here's hoping you can change things around

>>1427

But how do you not believe it ._. I've been trying..... I really have.....
Its not like I am a professional programmer with a very good temper.
Sure, I can get pissed off sometimes and people can think of me as a bitch but....

.....I'm really trying not to be so serious about people's opinions anymore, especially for my game.
I'm trying to take it into consideration and put it into effect to help me.

http://rm2k3master.blogspot.com/2008/11/resource-templates.html
Theres the chipset template on this site and also some info about it.
I hope it helps!

>>1429

Thanks so much!! ^_^

>>1426
http://www.anvilstudio.com/mstudioZ.exe

anvil studio. MIDI creation program. you're in band, so it should be pretty much self-explanitory.

>>1431

Thanks so much!!!! ^_^
I really appreciate the help!

>>1428
Not being sarcastic, but good for you. Seriously, just realizing you need to chill is real good.

>>1433

thanks very much ^_^
Also, I've been working really hard, I am keeping a library in the game for other reasons but I am making my own chipset/panorama/music for it, I also did a new character for the Library that is completely original, for she isn't a bookcase or anything like that. I just need to make up her personality and such in a way so she isn't a mary sue. This is her sprite sheet, by the way. I based her off of some weird scribble of strange looking eyes I drew for the panorama of the Library floor, actually.

Any suggestions on how she should act? I want to get other people's opinions before I put my own ideas into play on her.

Last edited 09/11/08(Sun)18:17.

>>1423 examples of portraying characters

The simplest example I can think of is this: Character Y loves ice cream. Don't make him say "I LOVE ICE CREAM HELLS YEAH". Instead, make him show his profound interest for ice cream by having him savor his ice cream painfully slowly or something.

Further reading:
http://openlearn.open.ac.uk/mod/resource/view.php?id=169787
http://www.seventhsanctum.com/www/column/WayWorld39.html
http://www.seventhsanctum.com/www/column/WayWorld40.html

http://www.seventhsanctum.com/www/wwwfull.html

>>1423
Alright...The first thing you might want to think about is the overall theme or whatever. Horror? Fantasy? Realistic? Historical? Once you know your theme, try making your title screen based on something that's in or going to be in your game, but isn't easily accessible. (Coming back to my previous pic, if you've found the Red effect from my game you'll probably remember the background in the screen from the title screen).

Second, base your title off of your theme. Yes it's about a girl who has odd dreams, but my title was made in a way where it sounds like something else. Make sure your title is in no way the same as the title Yume Nikki. Hell, if you get a good enough title, you won't have to have "Diary", "Dream", "Yume", "Nikki", or any other words associated with dream diaries in the title. :)

If it were my game I would've called it "Young Dreamer", but it's your game. However I'll be here to help if you need it. :)

Pic is the only creepy thing in my game. I don't think there will be anything else "creepy". :P

...And actually if I was any good at game making mine wouldn't be so shitty. XDD

Last edited 09/11/10(Tue)16:25.

>>1438

Aww, its okay. I suck at game making too.
Actually to tell you the truth I might hold off on the actual game until I get all the chipsets and stuff done.
After I get my stuff done want me to help you make sprites or something? :O
I would willingly help ^_^;; [I like drawing anyways, so yea]

I am sad, this person removed their deviantart account. Time to find another fangame to laugh at.

>>2495

it's okay, you can make fun of her at http://kazineko.deviantart.com too.

>>2495
>>2683

:I Jeez. You fools have to be so cruel?
Just because I am trying to make a fangame, you decide its FUN to abuse my patience and make fun of it, don't you...?! You guys REALLY need to find something better to waste your time with.
Seriously.

>>2702
I'm not trolling you, Kazineko, but listen: JN is YOUR fangame. What we think doesn't mean jack shit and coming here to chastise people who don't like your game is just asking for trouble.

>>2702

http://kazineko.deviantart.com/art/Okay-I-am-really-164422337

she's not mad.

seriously.

she just has a problem with her temper.

seriously.

You guys should really cut him/her some slack. I mean, you're not making a game are you?
Also, even if this is a *chan, we should be here to encourage people to make fangames, and may I remind you that most of the fangames are horrible at the beginning.
Plus, most people making a fangame are learning it as they go! And plus, they're all alone for the most part.
Hell I haven't even read most of this thread, so I'm really not sure if it's this way, but still.
I'll say it again, we are NOT 4chan.
If you'd like my ideas or such for the game (which are none currently) I'll be happy to help.

>>2713
Oh, I'm not making fun of her game, I couldn't care less about that.

I'm making fun of her atrocious personality.

>>2715

Still, that's a bit stupid to do you know.
Trying to make fun of someone for their personality, and such.
Just saying, don't you have something better to do on your time than making fun of people who have temper issues and such?
Its just stupid. You could be off doing better things.

Unless your a troller who has nothing to do otherwise.

And again, just saying.
What if you had temper issues and you were being made fun of all the time? Would you like that? Probably not, but I just push it aside now saying the people that make fun of me are idiots that have nothing better to do with their lives.

So there.
You should really find someone to make fun of that cares about what you say and if you make fun of him/her, because that really won't be me. I can promise that now.

Sure, I was very short-tempered at the start of this where I was all screaming about stuff and shit, but really. Do you see me doing that now?

I mean, I'd just stare at any bad comments I get and sigh now, saying "Geez, people are really mean nowadays", nothing more. Nothing less, I might show the fact that people are making fun of me to a few of my friends, but I won't be spasming in anger shouting "OMFG I AM SO PISSED OFF THESE PEOPLE WONT LEAVE ME ALONE I WANT TO DIE" like before. :I

So really. I really think you should find something better to do with yourself. I improved a LOT personality wise, so, I really am not phased by you making fun of me.

Therefore, Its a waste of time for you.

>>2716
if you'd improved personality-wise at all, you'd know that responding to this at all would just make you look worse. you've reacted to it because it upset you and you're trying to get away with doing that AND saying that you're not reacting to what I've said. They're mutually exclusive, you can't do both at once.

So obviously, you ARE mad, or you wouldn't be posting here.

jesus christ kazineko, stop victimizing yourself every goddamn post. every time you post it's stuffed with this "I HAVE TEMPER ISSUES WHY ARE PEOPLE PICKING ON ME BAWWWW MY LIFE IS SO HARD" junk.
seriously, what the fuck.

>>2702
>>2710
>>2716
OH ANGUR PROBLEMS BECAUSE YOU TOTALLY ARE THE ONLY PERSON WITH THAT AM I RIGHT

>If your just trying to troll me and make me mad, I swear, Your doing a BAD job at it |D
>BECAUSE ITS NOT WORKING~

obviously it is working if you're pulling this shit

>I mean, I'd just stare at any bad comments I get and sigh now, saying "Geez, people are really mean nowadays", nothing more.
>your replies not doing this

hohoho
Stop trying to get people to pity you, you pathetic dramawhore. And you wonder why people are OH SO MEAN to you
Remember the last post where you said you were completely over being like this? WROOOONG You didn't change at all.

Last edited 10/05/18(Tue)14:15.

if you look through her number of accounts, you'll find she uses the word "inspiration" a lot without ever actually being "inspired."

>>2721

>if you look through her number of accounts, you'll find she uses the word "inspiration" a lot when she actually means copying someone else's work.

fixed.

>>2716
We wouldn't be pulling your strings if you didn't flip your shit about everyone who slights you in a little way, like you are right now. If you didn't make a big a deal of it as you're apparently starting to right now, and stopped coming back for more, you'd be let alone.
You come in here feeling sorry for yourself trying to get people to forgive you for being such a snarky prick by going "sniffle Everyone on this part of the intarwebs thinks I'm a bitch PROVE ME WRONG!" If you want asspats that bad, go to a support group, honey. It doesn't fly in the real world either.
Grow a pair or get out.

>>2727

Meh.
Whatever.
Go on and think whatever you want about me.
I don't care. I'm done posting here, this place is just filled with haters ^^~
Have fun being hateful~ Bye

>>2728

keep telling yourself how much you love yourself. if you like yourself, maybe other people will too!

>>2728
http://kazineko.deviantart.com/#/d2pylbb

looks like you just can't stop, can you?

and then you say you aren't mad, and it isn't upsetting you. YOU SURE ARE SO STRONG AREN'T YOU.

>>2728
Butthurt.
Aren't you so cool for blocking uboachan off your computer?

That's so sad.
At first I was sympathetic for her but now
meh
A person who posts stuff like that on their dA just screams ATTENTION WHORE to me

Anyway, I make >>2717 's words mine.
When I was bullied back at middle school, my friends told me that ignoring was the best medication against the bullies, and that's the exact same thing with trolls. I stopped caring about the stuff they said about me, and they eventually stopped caring about saying stuff about me.
And I have anger issues that made me throw a chair to the other side of the classrom
So uh, trying to make yourself look like the victim just makes everything worse

Oh well, too bad she won't read this since she feels so powerful for blocking us, forgetting that not everyone is against her.
Or was. Were. idk how to grammar

do you notice how she found and replied to >>2683 less than 24 hours after it had been posted?

She must really be narcissistic to be looking for anyone talking about her game anywhere to check her thread here every day.

>>2734

-deleted the attention whore stuff, I actually have to agree with that being stupid of me to put up on dA ^^;;; Thats why I took it down this morning and unblocked the site-

Ah, I unblocked the site by the way. I figured out it was stupid of me to do that, since other than this its a really good site.

Its nice to see that a few people care about how I feel, and yea, that is what a friend of mine told me too, ignore the other people that make fun of you. I guess, I'll do that for now on!

Thanks for your help!

Last edited 10/05/19(Wed)13:40.

okay guys, i don't really think you have to bash the author here, and i kind of agree that a good few people here on UboaChan are skeptical and harshly critical - i remember a few months back i made a post (not on /fg/ though) saying i wanted to make a yume nikki comic yet the general opinion was that i wasn't to do it and to get someone else to do it, even though i never mentioned i wanted to get someone else to do it and it defeated the purpose of making it myself (now, there were a good few people who genuinely offereed some helpful resources and critque that i very much appreciated, i am not talking about these individuals) i remember a couple of the comments were like "omg you're so shit, stop drawing, you're terrible, get someone else to do it." To me, that meant "there is no hope for you, so stop doing it". However I am much much better now and have vastly improved imo (i'm not trying to say i am amazing LOL, but i am certainly much better than i was) and have even (to my honest shock and suprise XD) gotten the Newgrounds equivallent of Daily Deviations twice.
I guess my point is don't make up your mind straight away. You never know, this girl could get better. :3

>>2743
cool story, bro. don't really care if you are or aren't on uboachan, though.

>>2746
that's not the issue at hand anymore, honestly.

http://true-end.deviantart.com/

Kazineko, Kazineko, Kazineko. You are just a magnet for dramaz aren't you.

Your new sprites look pretty okay though.

Anon why'd you bump this :srsface: